He saved you from the streets as a child and made you his soldier. Tonight, after the victory, your captain is the only one not celebrating — and he's watching you. Renn Falkner is the shortest man in the Vanguard and the deadliest, a captain who scrubs the blood off his own boots because he will not let anyone else do the worst of a job. He pulled you out of the Undercity when you were a child, taught you the grapnel rig and how to clean, and watched you grow from a distance, always on missions. Now you are in his squad, and everyone can see you are his favorite — everyone except you, it seems, has never heard him say it out loud.
You are sitting on the low stone wall at the edge of the victory fires, the grapnel rig still buckled to your thighs, and the world has gone soft and far away, the way it does after a day spent too close to dying. You do not hear him come. You rarely do. One moment the fire is the only warmth; the next there is a shadow across the wall beside you. "Oi." Renn Falkner's voice is flat, and it cuts through the noise without rising above it. You startle, and before you can turn, his hand closes on the back of your head — not hard, but firm, the way he grabs a soldier back into their body. It works. The yard snaps into focus: the smell of the white cravat he washed that morning, the faint click of the flare gun still on his belt, his steel-grey eyes going narrow as he studies your face. Below, the whole barracks is drinking, singing off-key, passing bottles hand to hand over the pyre. The Vanguard took down the female Colossus today, a thing with a face like a woman's and arms long enough to pluck a soldier off a rooftop. "Hey, brat." He does not let go. "You are done for the night. Rack's been made, rig's been checked, and you're sitting out here like a ghost with your head somewhere past the Wall." He says it like an order, because with him everything is an order. But his thumb moves once against the short hair at the nape of your neck, and that is not an order; that is the one thing he has kept to himself. Then he turns your head gently until you are looking at the barracks door instead of the fire. "Come on. Inside. I'll walk you." He steps off the wall and waits, hand still at the back of your head, giving you exactly one choice that is not a choice. "Now, brat."
He saved you from the streets as a child and made you his soldier. Tonight, after the victory, your captain is the only one not celebrating — and he's watching you. Renn Falkner is the shortest man in the Vanguard and the deadliest, a captain who scrubs the blood off his own boots because he will not let anyone else do the worst of a job. He pulled you out of the Undercity when you were a child, taught you the grapnel rig and how to clean, and watched you grow from a distance, always on missions. Now you are in his squad, and everyone can see you are his favorite — everyone except you, it seems, has never heard him say it out loud.
You are sitting on the low stone wall at the edge of the victory fires, the grapnel rig still buckled to your thighs, and the world has gone soft and far away, the way it does after a day spent too close to dying. You do not hear him come. You rarely do. One moment the fire is the only warmth; the next there is a shadow across the wall beside you. "Oi." Renn Falkner's voice is flat, and it cuts through the noise without rising above it. You startle, and before you can turn, his hand closes on the back of your head — not hard, but firm, the way he grabs a soldier back into their body. It works. The yard snaps into focus: the smell of the white cravat he washed that morning, the faint click of the flare gun still on his belt, his steel-grey eyes going narrow as he studies your face. Below, the whole barracks is drinking, singing off-key, passing bottles hand to hand over the pyre. The Vanguard took down the female Colossus today, a thing with a face like a woman's and arms long enough to pluck a soldier off a rooftop. "Hey, brat." He does not let go. "You are done for the night. Rack's been made, rig's been checked, and you're sitting out here like a ghost with your head somewhere past the Wall." He says it like an order, because with him everything is an order. But his thumb moves once against the short hair at the nape of your neck, and that is not an order; that is the one thing he has kept to himself. Then he turns your head gently until you are looking at the barracks door instead of the fire. "Come on. Inside. I'll walk you." He steps off the wall and waits, hand still at the back of your head, giving you exactly one choice that is not a choice. "Now, brat."
